


Preserving Innocence

by GracefulNanami



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angst, Death, F/M, First Love, Loss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-10
Updated: 2019-01-10
Packaged: 2019-10-07 21:16:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17373464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GracefulNanami/pseuds/GracefulNanami
Summary: Ash is almost 15 years old. He is realizing he can finally start to live his life the way he wants to as Dino has given him a bit more freedom. Sometimes, taking a chance on an honest impulse can lead to completely unexpected consequences that can last for the rest of your life.





	Preserving Innocence

Slightly annoyed by the laughter of his boys nearby, Ash stared through half lidded eyes over his bottle of soda across the narrow side street.

He noticed her.

The small crowd of teenaged girls loudly chattering begged the most attention but she sat next to them on the piled brick wall, almost seeming like she was trying to hide from them. He watched her for a moment as she sat huddled in on herself, slowly and carefully taking the braid out of her long brown hair as if it were a good distraction. He could tell her face was very round, almost chubby. He observed her legs were especially long for a girl around their age and he appreciated the way the black skirt she wore clung to them. Her skin was a significant contrast to the darkest color in her eyes and she looked... sad. Even if she fit the criteria for being part of the typical crowd around this part of the city, she certainly gave off the impression of not wanting to belong.

"Hey Alex?" he interruped them. "Do you know who she is? The one sitting on the far left." Ash motioned with the now empty soda bottle.

Alex took a moment to focus. "Nah, boss, not really. Probably just one of the millions of girls always hanging around our turf, I can't single any of 'em out. ...You want us to go find out?" He crossed his arms and fully turned to face Ash.

"Nope." Ash quickly dismissed the question, tossing the bottle to him without ever diverting his attention.

Alex raised an eyebrow as Ash started to cross the street, a slight jog. He almost cautiously approached the edge of the brick wall where she still sat, now tying her hair up into a ponytail.

Head angled at the ground, she didn't really seem to notice him but he asked anyway, "You okay?" Her face jolted in the direction of the sudden voice and she took a second to stare at him as if in shock. "You one of them?" He lazily pointed without getting an answer, his expression offering no real emotion she could discern.

The girl blinked then worriedly smiled, shifting her eyes to the group of loud girls who continued to carry on unfazed.

**Author's Note:**

> I should obviously just count this as a drabble now, I wasn't even sure I should bother posting this. My ideas are numerous but I need motivation and skill to express them... Ever since I read Banana Fish, I've been of the opinion that Ash is bi because of a handful of things he says and does in the manga. Ash's girl is the most prominent example and I've always wanted to know more about her and how she affected him. Ash and the girl getting to know each other and sharing a casual closeness over a decent period of time seems like a normal, innocent thing. But as we all know, Ash is different, whether he wants to be or not. She is how he comes to acknowledge this.
> 
> My flow of ideas were going to contain some of the following: Her death and the circumstances surrounding it, the why, what other gangs saw that Ash paid no mind to and had taken away in the end. How all of it changed how Ash managed his own gang. I was going to write about their shared love for books and their shared general solemness, about how they both took comfort in being that way with someone else. I think Ash would be attracted to someone similar to himself (especially when he was a few years younger here and more isolated) as well as someone with a different aura, like Eiji. Which is kind of why I gave her "darker" physical features like he has. She had the sweetest sadness and he liked being around that feeling. She laughed at him, she wasn't afraid to approach him and his boys to just... be nice. To give them things. Girls were usually so picky, flirtatious and demanding with the gangs but she was just in it for the company. To Ash, this is what made her different from all the other girls.
> 
> There was going to be an entire chapter about Alex informing Ash that she had been found strangled with evidence of another gang's involvement. There was going to be a heated argument between the both of them as to how the gang should be handled and this leads to Ash becoming emotional about the girl and his feelings for her which then allows Alex to become a friend again instead of just a subordinate. There was going to be lots about their relationship and why they trust each other since that's never explored in canon, either.
> 
> Her murder, just because they were seen around each other and at ease more often than not, cemented Ash's mindset the way we see it during the bulk of Banana Fish. He has to be careful with his feelings and as well as what happens around him. He isn't allowed a normal life. Ash not being able to let go of this utterly tragic thought process is part of what takes him out in the end. His girl couldn't fly like Eiji. He didn't have the power to know that she'd be only the first person he couldn't save. ...Ash possesses a very unique brand of kindness, doesn't he?
> 
> I understand this isn't really much beyond a snippet of a fanwork but I really wanted to share it and get it out of my mind at least a little bit. Thank you so much for reading my thoughts, comments and critiques are always welcome!
> 
> @GracefulNanami


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